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January 24th, 2009
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The First Knowledge to Be Taken from the Ummah

Respect

Posted by Hamza Karamali, SunniPath Instructor on January 24th, 2009

In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful and Compassionate

No one will listen to you until you respect them.

Habib `Umar b. Hafiz (may Allah preserve him) said,

No one will ever be fit for calling others to Islam except someone who respects those he is calling. Whenever someone displays contempt for anyone, he distances more often than he brings close, repels more often than he attracts, and cuts others off from him more often than he ties them to him.

…

This is why the poet said

من وقر الناس وقروه … و فاز بالعقل و الرئاسة
و مزدريهم لو كان مسكا … لقيل في أصله نجاسة

Whoever respects people will be respected by them, and will win unto intelligence and leadership.

But someone who has contempt for them, were he to be made of musk, he would be told that he was originally filth. [1]

…

This is why we must approach people with love, concern, mercy, and compassion. And that is how the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) came to you: he was all mercy, compassion, humility, and politeness. This is why you will find that most of the early ones to respond to his call were the downtrodden people of Mecca … At the conquest of Mecca, Bilal [3] was the only one who climbed the Ka`ba when the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) told him, “Climb and call the people to prayer.” (Habib `Umar b. Hafiz, Tawjih al-Nabih li Mardati Barih, Kuwait: Dar al-Diya, 2008, p. 167)

[1] Musk comes from the originally filthy secretions of the musk-deer that collect in a sac and solidify.

[2] In other words, at the height of the Prophet’s political supremacy (Allah bless him and give him peace).

[3] A former slave.



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Comment:
1
Written by:
Qushayri
Posted on:
January 25th, 2009 at 9:55 am

Thank you for your post. I noticed a minor typo, the great grandfather of Habib Umar is Hafiz rather than al-Hafiz.

Habib Omar (Umar) b. Muhammad b. Salim b. Hafiz

Wassalam.

Comment:
2
Written by:
Qushayri
Posted on:
January 26th, 2009 at 10:45 am

Also, what’s the actual Arabic word that Habib Omar uses? Is it al-Ihtiram?

Regardless, how would you define ‘respect’?

Thanks in advance.

Wassalam.

Comment:
3
Written by:
Hamza Karamali
Posted on:
January 27th, 2009 at 5:51 am

Thanks for the correction. You are right and the spelling of Habib Umar’s name has been changed.

Comment:
4
Written by:
Hamza Karamali
Posted on:
January 27th, 2009 at 6:08 am

Yes, the Arabic word used by Habib `Umar is “al-ihtiram”. Respect for others is an Islamic virtue, even for those who are doing something that is unlawful, even for those who aren’t Muslim.

In my dealings with certain people, I have come across the misunderstanding that respecting others amounts to corroboration of their mistakes, and that we must therefore go out of our way to disrespect them, and I posted this entry in order to correct them.

Habib `Umar’s insight (may Allah preserve him) is that if you really want the mistake to go away, you need to approach people in a manner that makes them feel loved and honored, not in a manner that makes them feel hated and insulted. The key difference between Habib `Umar’s loving and honoring and that of others’ is that he bravely uses it as a door to da`wa and change, whereas others merely do it out of timid acceptance of the way things are.

What is meant by respect? Habib `Umar explains it here as treating people with kindness, politeness, concern, and compassion, and as not having contempt for anyone. All of these are virtues that our beloved Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) embodied and taught to his Companions.

Comment:
5
Written by:
Karim Elgoneimy
Posted on:
January 27th, 2009 at 9:37 am

In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful and Compassionate

Thank you for these nice words, i enjoyed reading them.


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